While not a lawyerly tip… If you drive a Toyota Corolla to the Red Neck Yacht Club’s Swamp Cabbage Weekend, there is about a 70% chance your car will get demolished in a spontaneous monster truck rally. A 16-year-old girl found this out the hard way when she attended the Florida’s largest mud party this past weekend. Apparently the large crowd stated the owner did not care if her car was destroyed. A “large white camouflaged van with five-foot wheels showed up and the crowd again said it was okay to drive over the car. The van put the front tire on the front of the car, smashing the hood, backed off, went to the other side and put his other tire on the hood, smashing it and went to the center, driving over the entire car.” The driver of the car, Norman Nowling (A+ red neck name) was arrested and charged with criminal mischief. The annual gathering features live music, camping, ATV attractions and of course the mud.
While San Francisco doesn’t crush cars with Astro-vans they do have plenty of crazy people to do the job. John Knight found this out the hard way when a “large naked woman” stoped through his Volvo windshield. Knight was driving down the street when a woman, wrapped in a blanket and surrounded by medical personnel, threw off the blanket and ran towards him. The lady, all 250 pounds of her, was only wearing sneakers when she climbed on the hood and began to smash the front window. Knight has stated he will not press charges.
How do you not press charges. I’m not even talking about the damage to the windshield. I’m talking about the emotional scars that John Knight will have whenever he closes his eyes. Some things cannot be unseen and Kelly Clarkson wearing shape-ups smashing my car window is one of them. Where was State Farm when you need them: “Like a good neighbor State Farm is there: with a Big Mac to lure this chick off my car.” Don’t believe me? Take a look:

Yikes.
P.S. What ever happened to Gravedigger? Do they still have Monster Trucks?
P.P.S. Don’t forget my Bitter Lawyer Post!







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